How do you feel?

How do you feel…when you just can’t make someone understand your point of view?
How do you feel… when that someone is still the most important person in your life?
How do you feel… when you can’t afford to give up on that someone?
How do you feel… when you just can’t feel anything anymore?!

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Confusion Confusion!!!

Ever since I read a post on Amrit’s blog about belief in God, I’ve been thinking which category will I fall in – atheist, thiest, agnostic gnostic???

I always thought and said that I am agnostic… but come to think of it, agnostics are those who are not sure whether they believe in God’s existence… but I am not that… I have full faith in God…but that doesn’t make me theist because I am not religious… I don’t believe in temples and pujas and rituals. So where do I fall?

I did some googling and found out that I fall in the category of ‘Agnostic Theism’, which is also known as ‘Spiritual Agnosticism’…I like that 🙂 That’s just what I am…Phew! Some relief there!

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And I’m Back!

There are some people in our lives who are never away…. you may meet or even talk to them after months or years…but it feels the same… as if you partied together just yesterday! Similarly, there are such places…you might visit them after years…but everything feels just the same!

And that’s what I feel for my blog right now. I know I’ve been away for quite sometime but it feels no different. I still feel the same connect with all my friends here 🙂

Well… to be very honest, I have no reason for being away…in fact, I had been free all this while…but just didn’t feel like writing anything! So updates first… I quit my job, went to Delhi for sometime where my Mom had a spine surgery, came back to Bangalore, job hunting, a trip to Chikmaglur, on the verge of getting a job, waiting for my b’day! 🙂

Mom had a spine surgery in late June… it was one of the toughest times of my life… mentally! The moment she came back from the OT in the room… that was the scariest sight…. it shook me… I was numb…I couldn’t move…I couldn’t speak for a few seconds…I wonder if I was even breathing or not… and 30 seconds later, the nurse tells me that I’ve to help her in shifting Mom from one bed to another…and I regained consciousness…and helped her….

Not that I have never seen anyone in that condition before that…I’ve seen people in situations much worse than that…but never my Mother….the lady who is epitome of strength for me…was lying there…half conscious – unable to move, unable to breath without an  oxygen mask, unable to speak… she had to make effort to even keep her eyes open for sometime… She has been my strength always… how could I be strong with her in this condition… but then I thought…now is my turn..to be her strength…and never did any sight or anything frighten me again! And I’m glad how I handled myself and everything else while I was there… I think I can be proud of myself for that!

And the best compliment – Mom one day said – “And I always thought you were fragile!”

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Oblivion is past…

… and I shall be back very soon!!!

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Knowing Myself Better….

Amrit tagged me to do this so here I go…

1. Were you named after anyone?

Nope…And that’s good only…I don’t like anything associated with me to be ‘after someone’ 🙂

2. When was the last time you cried?

Apparently last evening only 😛 Its strange… till some years back, I rarely used to cry…not that my life has become miserable now..its probably better than those yesteryears, but still…guess I’ve become much more emotional now…or rather have started showing my emotions a lot more now…donno whether its good or bad!

3.  Do you like your handwriting?

Mmmm… yes…pretty much!

4. What is your favorite lunch meat?

Well…I am not really a foodie… so anything will do 🙂

5. Do you have kids?

Nope..

6. If you were another person, would you be friends with you?

Now that’s a stupid question! How can I say that…unless I know who/what that ‘other’ me is… it really depends!

7. Do you use sarcasm?

Yes I do. Sometimes just for fun and sometimes to vent out my frustration! I think I’m pretty good at it 😉

8. Do you still have your tonsils?

Yes!

9. Would you bungee jump?

Oh yes, anytime! I did it once and it was simply amazing!!!

10. What is your favorite cereal?

Rice…I guess… again I’m not a foodie at all..so…

11. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?

Not always 😛 If I can take them off comfortably without untying..then I don’t bother to!

12. If you were to pick your own first name, what would it be?

Well…I quite like my name..so I don’t think I would want to change it!

13. What is your favorite ice-cream?

Butterscotch

14. What is the first thing you notice about people?

How good can they speak… I hate people with incorrect grammar!!!

15. Red or Pink?

RED

16. Whom do you miss the most?

See this!

17. Do you want everyone to complete the list?

Well…good if I see it completed by more people I know…will help me in knowing them better…but its okay even if they don’t 🙂

18. What color clothes are you wearing?

White and pink

19. What are you listening to right now?

Some of my thoughts 🙂

20. If you were a crayon what color would you be?

Black…

21. Favorite smells?

Mmmm…nothing very specific…

22. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?

Sam

23. How do you know the person who sent this to you?

A very sweet guy who commented on my blog for the first time today…He says my blog inspired him to start a blog…wow! (blink blink)

24. Favorite sports to watch?

Lawn Tennis and Cricket

25. Hair Color?

Black

26. Eye Color?

Brownish-Black or Blackish-Brown…call it whatever!

27. Do you wear contacts?

No…neither glasses 🙂

28. Favorite Foods?

Pav Bhaji…. anytime, any place 🙂

29. Scary movies or happy endings?

Depends on the mood!

30. Last movie you watched?

Chowrasta – The crossroads of love

31. What book are you reading right now?

The 7 Best Things Happy Couple Do – Pretty interesting book…almost through it now…

32. Summer or Winter?

WINTER

33. Hugs or Kisses?

Both are needed but if I have to chose one, I would prefer hugs over kisses 🙂

35. Describe your pencil cup?

The one here in office is cylindrical in shape, black in color…with a criss-cross design

36. Favorite Artist?

Bryan Adams, K.K., Jagjit Singh

37. What kind of music are you into?

Anything that is soft and has good lyrics.

38. What is on your mouse pad?

It says Dell

39. What did you watch on TV last night?

IPL match – Mumbai vs Kolkata

40. Favorite Sound(s)?

Water dripping, sound of leaves when its windy, guitar, piano…basically anything that’s pleasant to ears 🙂

41. Do you sing or play an instrument?

Yes I sing all the time (whether people around me like it or not!) and instrument…i can play a Casio 😛

42. What is the farthest you’ve been from home?

I’m bad at geography… I really don’t know!

43. Do you have a special talent?

Don’t know… people say that I have the capability to give them a perspective and make them feel better when they’re down… and that’s precisely why I started with the Relationship Counseling thing!

44. Where were you born?

In Delhi

45. Favorite piece of jewelery?

Ring…in fact, that’s all I ‘like’ in jewelery!

46. How did you meet your spouse/significant other?

Through my family/friend – long story!

47. Favorite Song?

Ahh… So many…

48. Favorite Musical?

None!

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Gosh…that was long…it seems so short when you’re reading others’ lists….!!!

Well… I am not tagging anyone…whoever feels like answering can do that 🙂

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All Smiles Today :)

It feels nice to get recognition for something you’ve put your heart in! Today is one of those nice days for me… If you remember, I told you sometime back that I am obsessed with the stats of my blog. In those stats, there is a section that tells you what search keys directed people to your blog. One of those search keys today was “Sakshi Gupta relationship counseling”… it might sound like a small thing…but somehow it gave me a lot pf pleasure 🙂 So just wanted to note it down here…

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3 years of absolute bliss!!!

I know this is the most cliche sentence I can say but still I’ll say it…. It seems like yesterday that we got married… doesn’t feel like three years by any stretch of imagination!!! And its so overwhelming to remember each of those special moments that we witnessed in this period… The SMS you sent to me just before reaching the wedding venue, the first night, the first drive to our Gurgaon home, the honeymoon and so many other trips, the fights, the disagreemnets and the warmth on solving those disagreements, the dilemma on jobs, moving to bangalore, dilemma on house, learning, unlearning, understanding and knowing each other more and more everyday, the good, bad and ugly times…oh man..i can go on and on and on….

Its unbelievable for me and for others who know me…to see that someone has tolerated me for so long… and that without many grins 🙂 I know how impossible I get at times… but to be honest..I like doing that 😉 I also know how nasty I get at times butthen again, I ove doing that also 😀

On a more serious note, I still believe that I couldn’t have been luckier…. coz you are still ‘Better than the best’… I love you…more than you will ever know…more than I can ever say… and though it seems like yesterday when we got married…I can’t imagine my life without you! You’re a sweetheart!

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Aghast!

Sometimes you come across situations/stories in life to which you don’t know how to react. I came across one today. Someone who has recently become close to me shared a piece of her life…probably the worst one… and i was completely shocked… didn’t know what to tell her… but she is someone who is mature enough to get comforted by silence also!

All I can say is we, humans, can be so so wrong in judging people…God, this is so disturbing… I hope she finds peace… soon!

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From hedge funds to pizzas!!!

Just read another of this recession stories…. it shocked the hell outta me…

The only good part of this phase is that people are learning a lot and realizing the importance of savings… but do we really implement it till such time that we really face it?! I guess most of us don’t. And me…writing this here… have I really done something yet? No. In fact I just did some crazy shopping this weekend. And I am feeling stupid now. And so I hope I continue feeling this stupid and do something about it soon!!!

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Succisive Moments

Yes…I have lots of them… ‘SUCCISIVE’ moments… and in my view anyone can… you just have to make that effort… be determined to have your own ‘succisive’ time…to be yourself…to be with yourself… to realize yourself… to know yourself…and to do some other random stuff!!!

Well… a proof of the statement that I have a lot of ‘succisive’ time is that I keep stumbling on new and interesting things every single day (apart from being myself).. but I’m not ranting… I love it! This time, thanks to Shivanand, I came across this website called “Save The Words” I think it’s an amazing concept. Herein, you can adopt any word from their huge list of words which are more or less no longer in use… you adopt a word and vow to spread it by using it in your conversations as much as possible…

And now I am a proud parent of the word ‘SUCCISIVE’ 🙂
SUCCISIVE –> of spare or extra time.

So all of you out there… don’t waste your succisive moments… there’s so much to do.. go get one for yourself! And trust me, it’s a nice feeling 🙂

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